The Prescription

Lately, my conversations and experiences have revolved around the prescription; more specifically, the “right” way to live. Is there even such a thing? It is my opinion that an ideal way to exist, according to societal expectations, does indeed penetrate the very fibers of our being. But, I do not believe that this image we have been sold is, in any way, the “right” way to live...only a mere sales pitch. One, I am afraid, that makes the world around us operate successfully, although, in most cases, miserably.

The prescription that I speak of is the one that faces college graduates in their last semester, or, really anyone in their twenties: job, husband or wife, house, family pet, kids, grandkids …preferably in that order. This is the very prescription I, myself, once coined as “right.” But what, exactly, is right about it? Stability, security, love, belonging, and purpose all come to mind. It actually sounds pretty good. Then, why is it that this “right” seems to be “wrong” for so many?

Is it the trapping sensation felt when financial obligation commits you to one location and, possibly, one vocation? Is it the predictability and isolation of “forever” with another human being? The exhaustion of parenting that is different from the Norman Rockwell painting? Possibly. But I think that might sound a little jaded. Realistic, perhaps? Maybe.

Without question, there are associations with the prescription that are desirable, but I do not believe it is the prescription itself. A job, at the very least, gives a person purpose; and, if not purpose, financial stability. In a perfect world, it would do both. If, by chance, these objectives could be fulfilled outside of employment, I believe satisfaction could be achieved. Along those same lines, a significant other is supposed to symbolize companionship and love. While I do believe this could work, I also believe that these same needs can be met with other people. It is my opinion that living amongst many provides a more balanced, possibly positive, environment for all human beings...especially children…than an isolating immediate family experience. With the support of many, men and women are lifted of the burdens to themselves and each other as members of the opposite sex, but also as parents. Women help each other raise children and serve as a necessary support system for one another, while men can feel understood and appreciated within their own gender. In short, the community at large benefits from such strength, physical and emotional, in numbers.

Is this concept realistic? As previously mentioned, under current survival circumstances, it is not for the majority. The world, as we know it, works because of the prescription. Communities are built because couples buy houses. Those same couples find work in the area to pay for their house. In most cases, kids follow to create a family. Finances become a huge priority for the family, making the job an even more important necessity. And once the kids are in school, relocation is nearly impossible. It is the prescription that keeps businesses booming and houses off the market. If everyone was free from obligation, personal and financial, there would be significant instability.

It would be irresponsible of me to suggest that the prescription isn’t right for anyone. In fact, I think it works for many. But is it something people choose because it makes them happy, or because they have been told it will make them happy? And how could one really know if it will make him or her happy until he or she experiences it? More importantly, are people limiting their options to marriage, mortgage, and birth children in an attempt to achieve the desirables of love, companionship, stability and family?

While I am certainly grateful to those who follow the prescription, and would never foolishly rule it out, I am hoping to keep the options to achieve my desirables limitless.